


Sea of Dreams

by mlmao



Category: BoJack Horseman
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Anxiety Attacks, Bojack is Bi, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-31
Updated: 2020-10-15
Packaged: 2021-03-06 05:54:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,489
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25628542
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mlmao/pseuds/mlmao
Summary: Herb Kazzaz and Bojack Horseman create a life for themselves.
Relationships: BoJack Horseman/Herb Kazzaz
Kudos: 22
Collections: Ollywoo AUs





	1. A New Start

To Herb, there was nothing better than sharing drinks with the man he loved. 

The first episode of Horsin' Around had been a huge success, and Herb couldn't have been happier. With almost 20 million viewers, the network already knew this show was going to be a hit. Herb knew that his friend had been working his ass off to get recognized somehow, the sheer determination he had made the success even more beautiful. Bojack Horseman was finally getting recognized after years of figuring things out, but Herb could tell that he was having split feelings.

The California sunset had turned the sky to a bright orange, the clouds in the sky glimmering with a mystical gleam. While the view from the apartment porch wasn't glamorous, to Herb it was the most beautiful sight in the world. The cheap scotch in Herb's glass couldn't have been better right now. This could be the start of a new life.

Bojack stumbled into the living room, shaky hands and scared eyes, his breaths were heavy and sporadic. Herb set his scotch aside on the crappy porch, immediately noticing his friend's condition.

"Hey hey, BJ! What's going on?"

"I...They...This is a mistake. I'm a mistake. I can't do anything to make them love me."

Bojack fell to his knees, staring at his shaky hands with tears in his eyes, his breaths getting faster and lighter. Herb was quick to kneel down beside him.

"Bojack, if this doesn't please them, then nothing will. You've already done so much, and maybe they should get their own sitcom if they could do better!"

As his eyes closed tight, tears started to pour down his face, Bojack hated showing this kind of intimacy even with Herb.

"Herb. I'm scared. I don't want to hurt you or disappoint you."

"Oh BJ, you could never disappoint me. And if you somehow do, I'd be more impressed than anything."

Herb took Bojack's hands and held them with a gentle grip, causing Bojack to open his eyes in surprise. The thing Bojack immediately noticed was Herb's kind and reassuring smile, his heart felt like it was warming up. That smile always made Bojack feel warm.

"Now BJ, I want you to breathe with me, alright"

"A-Alright."

"You ready?"

"Y-Yeah. Yeah."

Bojack tried to give Herb a smile back, shaky as it was, it still filled Herb with the warmness that Bojack felt.

"In...and out....and in...and out."

In that moment of synchronized breathing, it felt like they were transported to another world, where only they existed. As Bojack breathed slowly, he felt warmer and warmer, what was this feeling? After a few minutes of breathing, Herb broke the silence.

"You feel any better?"

"Yeah. I do."

"Good, I don't want those jack-asses taking this victory away from you BJ. You deserve this success."

"...Do I?"

"Of course you do! We've been at this thing for years, and we finally did it. You did it."

Bojack, without thinking, hugged Herb. He never felt this way before, this beautiful support that Herb had given filled Bojack with so many powerful feelings. 

"How did I ever deserve someone like you, Herb..."

"What are you talking about, BJ?"

"You've always been there for me, hell, you pitched Horsin' Around for me! You've given me so much support that...that I never got. Thank you so much, Herb. Thank you."

"Hey now, you've given me a lot of support too. When we first met, your sheer determination for comedy...it captivated me! I think meeting you revived my love for comedy."

"Wait, really?"

"Really really."

"Wow...I had no idea."

"Well, now you do."

Bojack chuckled weakly, not even realizing he's smiling again.

There was another moment of silence where Bojack and Herb just smiled at each other. A hypnotic moment of pure joy, at least until the phone rang. Bojack's smile instantly vanished as a look of fear overtook his face.

"Oh god it's Mom-Bea. She hates it. She hates me. She-"

Herb stood up and walked over to the phone and instantly hung up, making sure Beatrice couldn't call back by placing the receiver off of the switch hook.

"Not tonight, we're not letting that crotchety old hag get you down. Until she stops being such a high horse, at least."

Bojack chuckled as he shakily stood up, "That was an awful pun, you know that right?"

"At least I didn't ask if you got the joke." Herb chuckled in reply.

Herb put his hand on Bojack's shoulder, with that beautiful reassuring smile still on his face.

"How about we watch some old Secretariat races, huh BJ?"

"Really? I'll go get my vhs collection and...and set everything up!" Bojack blurts out before excitedly walking to the bedroom closet. He never showed his collection of Secretariat tapes to anyone before, and he was happy to finally show them off. Finally he had a wonderful pillar of support by his side.

-

Herb woke up to the bright blue light of the tv beaming into his eyes. He groggily stretched out his arms before noticing a passed out Bojack resting on his legs. A chuckle escaped Herb's lips before he softly ran his hand through Bojack's mane. In the cloak of darkness, he whispered three words that held so much power towards the two friends. He was glad he could finally say this aloud, even if no one was around to hear. Herb was glad he could finally say,

"I love you."


	2. Morning Cup of Bo(Jack)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bojack tries to piece together the reason behind his recent feelings surrounding happiness.

Bojack stood in the shabby kitchen, coffee mug in hand, looking out the porch door while he daydreamed. His mind wandered with thoughts about the recent success he shared with best friend and roommate, Herb. It didn't take long for Bojack to think of the worst possible outcomes, worries soon filling his brain. He took another swig from the mug, the bitter drink filling his senses. Bojack preferred his coffee without sugar.

Bojack walked out onto the small porch, the fresh morning breeze running through his mane. He stared off into the sunrise with a blank and pensive expression, along with a distant gaze. Bojack wondered why he felt the way he did. Horsin' Around had been a huge success, why didn't he feel the happiness he was supposed to? Experiencing true happiness and joy was an enigma to Bojack, he couldn't track the source for the life of him. As Bojack continued to think and think, he drew a mental chart of all the times he had felt happy.

Most of the happy memories that came to mind were filled with people, mainly parties Bojack had went to. Though, the happiness was extremely temporary. As soon as Bojack was alone, the dread and sadness flooded back. Well except when he was with Herb, Herb was different.

How though? How was Herb different? Bojack rattled his brain, desperately trying to think of why Herb was so different. 

He let out a sigh, his grip on the coffee mug growing slightly tighter.

"Morning BJ!"

Bojack yelped before dropping his coffee mug off of the porch, the mug instantly shattering when it hit the concrete below.

"Jesus Herb!"

Herb couldn't help but burst out laughing, "Jeez, what's gotten you so tense? You anxious about something?"

"Well now I am! That coffee mug was my favorite." Bojack huffed, crossing his arms.

Herb chuckled as we walked on the porch, standing right beside Bojack.

"Okay, now what's really on your mind?" 

There was a pause, the words dangling on Bojack's tongue.

"...Promise that you won't think I'm an idiot?"

"Bojack, don't be silly. Unless you tell me that the Earth is flat or something, I promise I won't think you're an idiot.

The taller man took in a deep breath before gulping, apprehensive to show vulnerability. While Bojack debated to himself whether to say what's been going on, Herb stood patiently with a gentle smile on his face.

"I'm, I'm scared. I'm really scared, Herb." Bojack managed to blurt out.

"How come?"

"Well. I'm happy. But that's why I'm scared. I don't know when or how I'll screw it up."

"Oh jeez BJ, you're not going to screw anything up. You deserve this happiness, it's not a trick or a mirage, and it's definitely not something you're going to mess up."

Bojack stayed silent for a moment, wanting to contest to Herb's kind words, but he stopped for a moment.

"You really think I'm not going to mess this up?"

Herb chuckled as he set a hand on Bojack's shoulder, "Of course not. As long as you don't murder anyone, I think everything's going to turn out just fine."

"Yeah?"

"Yup. Now, do you want to grab a celebratory Egg McMuffin? Or do you want to humor my cooking skills again?" Herb spoke, that wonderful smile tugging at his lips once again.

Bojack chuckled, "I think I'll go with the Egg McMuffin today."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for this chapter being a long time coming and being a lot shorter, stuff's been going on in my personal life and its been hard to come back to this fic
> 
> though im thinking abt making this a slow burn fic with short chapters instead of just a series on oneshots
> 
> anyways i hope you enjoyed this, and have a nice day :P
> 
> (also i know the chapter title pun is bad but im stickin with it fuck you)


End file.
